*sighs* Yes. I know, very cliche. But, as it says, here is the best of 2012. Moses style.
*being a taste tester Christmas day at Oma's*
Me: It tastes like strawberry marshmallows.
Dad: (quoting Better Off Dead) It has raisins in it.
Mom, Dad and I: You like raisins.
Grandpa Fred *stares at the can*: There aren't any raisins in it.
"It got hit by car!"
"No, it just fell down."
"You have nothing to lose... But your pride! FARKLE!"
"Same on Christmas day, you'll be shitting rainbows that day too."
"Dude, I think this is real."
"Then she's a not a bad actor, just a bad person."
-Beavis and Butthead
Alisa:"He looks Puerto Rican."
Mom:"When have you ever seen a Puerto Rican?"
Alisa:"They're all over Stanwood."
Mom:"There are not!"
Alisa:"Well, there's lots of Mexicans."
Mom:"One day, you're going to get hit."
"What do I do?"
"Nothing dear, you're not qualified."
Cailin:"Ooh! This is a great song."
Mom:"No, its not."
Cailin:"Thats why you're here, just to contradict me."
"Santa Claus doesnt bring presents to models."
"I grew up next to a girl named Taylor. She was a dumb bitch."
Mom on the phone: Yeah, yeah, they're engineers!
Me thinking to self: Trust me. I'm an engineer.
"Use your words Hayley."
"I'm trying!"
"Because he can't take life by the balls and deal with his problems without drugs! I'm making my rage quit faces Cole!" My rage quit faces!
"I hit myself in the face with a rake and it hurt less than teaching this class."
Oh god of homework I beseech you! I give up. I'm going to do my homework.
"What are those?"
"Chinese checkers."
"Oh… I thought they were candy. I was going to eat one."
"I just like you in a hat."
Dad:"So you're saying you don't like my hair."
Alisa: "Wow, he just pulled a woman on you."
Mom: "Are you going to make me a sandwich?"
"Basically, Portugal is like Spain... Only not."
"Whats a crinkle? Is that some sort of birth defect?"
"These papers make me feel imporant."
"Senators are crusty old men with dirty underwear!"
"Hayley, will you pinch my nipple?"
"No!"
"Why won't anyone just pinch my nipple?!"
"Every family member says they hate each other... I never said I actually do."
-Meg to PJ
Me: "Calm your tits."
Cole: "These tits can't be calmed."
"What happened? Are you transmitting the meaning of the universe Karin?"
"So dizzy..."
"What's wrong?"
"No idea. Music makes it go away for the most part.
i blame aliens sending wavelengths into my brain giving me vertigo."
"That was fun."
"How was that fun?"
"We got lost."
"We were'nt lost. I just took us to the wrong hospital."
"You even have a puke bucket! And its pink!"
"Number one: girls can't fart. Number two: if they do, not on my bed."
"... Whatever. Shirts are for pussies." -Alisa
"My thanksgiving started when Besta took the phone from PJ and held it upside down saying: No one's there!"
"Apparently being afraid of Steve Jobs riding a bicycle is perfectly understandable."
"Is someone crying in there or are you listening to opera!?"
"Opera!!!!"
*intense laughter from alis and I*
Mom: "What a strange answer."
"Turn off the damn opera!!!"
This is why I enjoy being related to my family.
"Some people I just want to stab."
"You continually tell me this."
"I'm practicing my stabbing motions."
"16 Camano, there is a rogue cow in the road."
"No reading real books is not an option."
"Put your hand down before I tear it off and beat you with it!"
Me: You couldnt get the chocolate to melt could you?
Alisa: Shut the fuck up.
I don't know how to fix the white highlight glitch there.
Me: It tastes like strawberry marshmallows.
Dad: (quoting Better Off Dead) It has raisins in it.
Mom, Dad and I: You like raisins.
Grandpa Fred *stares at the can*: There aren't any raisins in it.
"It got hit by car!"
"No, it just fell down."
"You have nothing to lose... But your pride! FARKLE!"
"Same on Christmas day, you'll be shitting rainbows that day too."
"Dude, I think this is real."
"Then she's a not a bad actor, just a bad person."
-Beavis and Butthead
Alisa:"He looks Puerto Rican."
Mom:"When have you ever seen a Puerto Rican?"
Alisa:"They're all over Stanwood."
Mom:"There are not!"
Alisa:"Well, there's lots of Mexicans."
Mom:"One day, you're going to get hit."
"What do I do?"
"Nothing dear, you're not qualified."
Cailin:"Ooh! This is a great song."
Mom:"No, its not."
Cailin:"Thats why you're here, just to contradict me."
"Santa Claus doesnt bring presents to models."
"I grew up next to a girl named Taylor. She was a dumb bitch."
Mom on the phone: Yeah, yeah, they're engineers!
Me thinking to self: Trust me. I'm an engineer.
"Use your words Hayley."
"I'm trying!"
"Because he can't take life by the balls and deal with his problems without drugs! I'm making my rage quit faces Cole!" My rage quit faces!
"I hit myself in the face with a rake and it hurt less than teaching this class."
Oh god of homework I beseech you! I give up. I'm going to do my homework.
"What are those?"
"Chinese checkers."
"Oh… I thought they were candy. I was going to eat one."
"I just like you in a hat."
Dad:"So you're saying you don't like my hair."
Alisa: "Wow, he just pulled a woman on you."
Mom: "Are you going to make me a sandwich?"
"Basically, Portugal is like Spain... Only not."
"Whats a crinkle? Is that some sort of birth defect?"
"These papers make me feel imporant."
"Senators are crusty old men with dirty underwear!"
"Hayley, will you pinch my nipple?"
"No!"
"Why won't anyone just pinch my nipple?!"
"Every family member says they hate each other... I never said I actually do."
-Meg to PJ
Me: "Calm your tits."
Cole: "These tits can't be calmed."
"What happened? Are you transmitting the meaning of the universe Karin?"
"So dizzy..."
"What's wrong?"
"No idea. Music makes it go away for the most part.
i blame aliens sending wavelengths into my brain giving me vertigo."
"That was fun."
"How was that fun?"
"We got lost."
"We were'nt lost. I just took us to the wrong hospital."
"You even have a puke bucket! And its pink!"
"Number one: girls can't fart. Number two: if they do, not on my bed."
"... Whatever. Shirts are for pussies." -Alisa
"My thanksgiving started when Besta took the phone from PJ and held it upside down saying: No one's there!"
"Apparently being afraid of Steve Jobs riding a bicycle is perfectly understandable."
"Is someone crying in there or are you listening to opera!?"
"Opera!!!!"
*intense laughter from alis and I*
Mom: "What a strange answer."
"Turn off the damn opera!!!"
This is why I enjoy being related to my family.
"Some people I just want to stab."
"You continually tell me this."
"I'm practicing my stabbing motions."
"16 Camano, there is a rogue cow in the road."
"No reading real books is not an option."
"Put your hand down before I tear it off and beat you with it!"
Me: You couldnt get the chocolate to melt could you?
Alisa: Shut the fuck up.
I don't know how to fix the white highlight glitch there.
