Justin Bieber. Fat people. Lazy people. Americans.

I don't feel like going in the order I put those things in, so, I'll start with..
Americans.
Americans are lazy. I'm not saying that other nations in the world don't have lazy people in them, it's just that the US has the most concentrated level of laziness. Because we are lazy fucks. That's it. Americans also feel the need to judge everyone they see. If you're a girl and have guy friends, you're a whore. If you're a guy with female friends, you're a player. If you dress well, you're conceited. If you wear clothes that are comfortable you're a slob. If you're bisexual or a lesbian, you're confused. If you're gay, you're going to go to hell. If you wear loose clothes, you're fat. If you're skinny, you're anorexic. If you have bags under your eyes, you're on drugs. If you cry, you're a drama queen. If you're nice to strangers, you're fake. We live in a society where it doesn't matter who you really are. You are labels. The thing is though, is that labels are stereotypes. And stereotypes exist because THEY ARE TRUE. Someone, somewhere fits that stereotype.  The problem with these stereotypes is, more than 90% of the population in the US, some billion or something people label people. ALL THE FUCKING TIME. It's ridiculous. I mean fuck, if you have a speech impediment, you're mentally retarded. If you fall asleep in class because you didn't sleep well and desperately need sleep, you're a slacker. If you don't turn your homework in, and get bad grades, not only are you a slacker, but you're stupid. America sucks. I really don't like so many people. I would say hate but, in this society, the word hate means nothing. It makes no impact. People joke about it. They go "I hate you" "Oh I hate you too." It's ridiculous. 
JUSTIN BIEBER
I didn't know that Justin Bieber was eighteen. Nuff said. I thought he was my little sister's age.

Fat and Lazy people.
I'm putting the two together because they generally go together in the first place. Biggest Loser, My 600 Lb Life, all that shit is dumb. And ridiculous. My middle younger sister is lazy. To the extreme. My two youngest sisters have a tiny room. It is constantly messy. And they have more storage equipment than anyone in the house. Or any part of the house. I will admit that my room isn't the cleanest, but I do intend to clean it at some point next week, because I need to gather laundry, and put clean laundry away.It could actually be a lot worse than it is now. My little sisters, except for Alisa, are complete slobs. My little sister Meghann has eczema. And she likes to sleep in the dirty clothes she wore the day before. And it makes her eczema worse. Yeah. Messed up.And gross.

Washington weather.

Washington  is going through a crisis. We're having thunder. And lightning. This, this is not normal. So as I sit here writing this, and eating pretzels and ranch, there is thunder. It came to a point a few times that the thunder shook the windows. Yeah. This has been going on for TWO DAYS. It's annoying as fuck. The thunder scares the dog. It's funny, yet I feel bad when I take him out for bathroom breaks. Or walkies. This SUCKS. Washington suddenly develops Texas weather. Nothing I knew of this weather is true anymore!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well...

Well, this is my last day in photojournalism. My last day to dink around on the internet at school and use Photoshop CS5. Wow. This sucks. I'm all sad now. I never really wanted the school year to be over. Yeah yeah yeah I get to go to a wedding and possibly bring the love of my life along so he can FINALLY meet everybody. But, whey hey I guess. I'm all depressed now. Sure, I have photoshop at home but it's not the same, and I can't figure out how to change the view on photoshop elements to make it easier(and not so much of a pain in the ass) to use. Wow. This, really sucks. And I really have to pee. Lovely. 

Good Times

What exactly is the definition of good times now adays? For me, it used to mean Alisa and I went outside and played games, and watched movies like E.T., Cats Can't Dance, Winnie the Pooh, all the cool ones. Now... Good times are sitting around and drinking and smoking and doing drugs. Am I the only one that sees the problem here? I miss being able to go outside everyday and play with my sister and live in the little world that consisted of our yard. I miss my big box of Lego, and my Barbies and everything that made up that world. Something happened in the last twelve years. But, I don't know exactly what. I just know that it's wrong.

Lego!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My dad, says that we're all made out of the same box of Legos. (He was saying this to my sisters and I. At the time I was incredibly offended, where was I before I so rudely interrupted myself? Oh yeah..) While he was going on and on about us all being made from the same box of Legos I was thinking  that while Alisa and I were made from the same box, Meghann and PJ were made from a different box entirely. Thinking now, we're just made from different Lego Builder Sets. And, in my artist statement I wrote for our big final project, I decided to say that really, we're all made from the same box of Legos, just different Builder Sets. Sweet huh? Definitely an A there. 

Yaaay! We're back in business!

Adventures on LSD

#3: Welcome to Hell

ONCE upon a time, there were five friends(and some zombie-ninja-fairies), and they really liked to trip out. And, one day, they were just messing around, when they fell… Into a hole of doom. And they landed in a random forest in I-don’t-know-where. This, is James the Fucking Pixie, Harry the Unicorn, Jesus, Maurise the Narwahl, and I’s story. 
And, this story is called, Our Adventures on LSD. Story #3: Welcome to Hell. 

*         *          *

We were all hanging out one day (this was before our big adventure Welcome to Hell, but, really, I want to start before the story really begins), and decided to go trip out again. While we were chilling on the couch hearing colors, and seeing music, a big ass hole opened up. Naturally, James got up, and was all:
“Dude. What the fuck is that?” 
We all shrugged, and were all: “How the hell should we know?” 
Then, this random lady came out and pulled us all into the hole. And here we are now, sitting in the middle of a forest, in Bum-fuck-nowhere, lost as fuck. By the way, we use the f bomb a lot. 
  “Shit dude.”
“Woah.”
“Are you sure we’re still tripping?” I stand up.
“Guys, we are so totally not tripping. This is nuts. That hole of doom must’ve stolen our trip. Damn, that must be one hungry hole.” We’re all up and looking around this big ass forest. James the Fucking Pixie is floating as usual, two inches off the ground. 
KERSMASH! 
“HOLY SHIT!” 
Some random chick comes out, she’s hella short, and well, floating. Like James does.  What the fuck? She’s short, with black hair, and the same stick figurey type figure that James has. She looks at us all wide eyed. Then says (in utter bewilderment),
“JAMES!!! WHERE THE FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN!?” 


All eyes go to James. Who’s looking too squeamish for words. She looks so pissed off, you have no idea. James sighs. He looks like he’s on the verge of a really long story I don’t exactly think I want to hear but, he starts on it anyways. 
“You guys… This is my cousin. Elena the Fucking Botanist.”
“Damn straight I am! You are in so much trouble mister, you need to get your ass back home right-” James interrupts her.
“ELENA. I am older than you. And the forest isn’t my home anymore. My home is with these guys,” he gestures to us. “And, I’m going to stay with them in California.” Wow, I didn’t think she could get anymore pissed but she is. 
 Maurise the Narwahl’s cage gets rattled and he says, all slowly and chill-like,
“What exactly happened here?” James sighs again. 
“I left the forest because I was tired of living here. And. . . Well, that’s not important.” I look around some more, and notice that this place looks kind of familiar and I can’t remember why. Elena the Fucking Botanist starts going on and on about some weird tangent saying that James is a prince. James motions for us all to head off behind him, and we walk and walk and walk, until we come across something that makes Elena the Fucking Botanist cringe. A tall plant, with magenta dots on the stem, and several braches of little clusters of white flowers.      
    She reaches for a knife at her waist. The plant has a sleeping face. 
Elena whispers, “The Beast of Poison Flowers.” 
“Pardon?” James, Harry the Unicorn, Maurise the Narwahl, Jesus and I say.
The “Beast of Poison Flowers doesn’t look so sleeping anymore… Come to think of it, it looks a little like hemlock. Poison hemlock. But, this stuff is controlled in the States. Okay so.. It’s not where we are but. . .
“When are we?” I ask. James looks a little sad. 
“About three hundred years into the past.” 
“Say what?” Elena the Fucking Botanist looks even more angry. 
“You went to the future!? How could you! You know that’s forbidden!”
“To goddamn bad Elena,” James looks over at Jesus and says, “No offense bro. Elena, I left because I wanted to. Not as some revenge or rebellion or anything. I left because I felt like it.” Elena puts her hands on her hips, and then. . . The poison hemlock speaks in a growly voice, that makes the ground rumble,
“A human has entered the forest, a human to be poisoned. A human and friends. The pixies are already dying, the human will only bring about the death to its race. A narwahl, a saint, a unicorn and a pixie, all coming along with the human from the future. A human brought us with it to the future, in the human past, and we easily took over. . . But I can smell that the human knows we did not prevail in devouring the humans. We will devour the pixies, and we will devour the humans. Do not underestimate us human, we know of your ways, and we know how to devour you, your race, and in the course of time we will devour your world. Just as we have done before, and as we will to this forest, this land of creatures unknown to the humans. You all disguise yourselves, the saint, the unicorn, the narwahl and the pixie, so you will remain left in peace. And as the clock continues clicking, the course of time will deceive you, and you will be thrown into a land of destruction.”
Elena the Fucking Botanist mutters,
  “Now you’ve done it.” and bolts in the opposite direction, actually flying, not floating as James usually does. He grabs my arm and says, 
“We should get going now.” He stops floating and picks me up, actually flying for once, and Jesus follows running in the air, and Maurise and Harry are just chilling floating with us. We stop after a few minutes, and then we land in a village. A village I know I’ve seen before. But. . . When? Oh well. Some old dude with a beard comes up to us, and Elena the Fucking Botanist is hovering behind him. James looks unaffected by the old dude. Even though the old dude looks kind of scary. And, the shouting begins.
“WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN! DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG WE WERE LOOKING FOR YOU! THAT HUMAN LURED YOU OUT OF THE FOREST WHERE YOU BELONG! WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN DOING ALL THIS TIME!? GETTING HIGH WITH THE SILLY GIRL BEHIND YOU? YOU BETTER TAKE YOUR PLACE AS PRINCE OR YOU WILL NOT TAKE IT BY CHOICE, IT WILL BE HANDED DOWN TO YOU AND YOU WILL! NOT! LEAVE! AGAIN!” 
James sighs, I really need to keep track of how often he sighs while we’re here.
“My answer to you is this, she did not lure me out of the forest. I left. I am not going to be prince. I am going to go back to California and be with my friends.” 
   The old guy motions to some armed dudes with neatos staffs. They stand around Harry, Maurise and Jesus. 
“They will leave, you and the human will stay.” He snaps his fingers and 
KABLAMO! 
They’re gone. What? What? Everyone seems to be staring holes through me. Is it what I’m wearing? I’m just wearing a blue t-shirt, and some jeans. I get why this is all so familiar. I’ve been here before… I remember falling through a hole, and finding myself in some random forest with some random guy looking down at me, and then he took me back to my house, and stayed. Oh, I see what happened. There’s a lot of shouting and what seems to be the same poison hemlock plant comes crashing into the village. Wonderful. You can see the roots, all gross like, with one root, that’s got purpley-red blotches on it. Gross. People are running and screaming, and then there’s me. Going, what the fuck is going on here? Because I really don’t know. There’s quite a few poison hemlock plants now, and I’m being pulled across the courtyard and into a tree. Since when do people hide inside trees? Aren’t you supposed to be up at the top? I look around, Elena the Fucking Botanist was the one who pulled me in here, and with an oomph! James is at the entrance guarding it. Elena looks like she’s about to fess up to something. 
“There’s. . . I, well, at the other end of the forest, in the really infested part, there’s the Mother Beast, the original plant that came here. It might be able to help us, some dwarves came through earlier, saying that a huge beast had helped them get rid of a problem, and that the beast was at the far eastern edge of the forest, little did we know. . . All they did was move their problem to our forest.” 
“James.”
“Yes?”
“I have a feeling that there’s an adventure landing on our faces.”
*         *                  *                *                   *           *


   And so we set off, wandering through the forest with a poorly drawn map, and an incentive. Elena gave us her journal where she had written down notes about the poison hemlock plants. There’s notes on how there’s a strong enough toxicity to kill in high doses, and that every part of the plant is poisonous, particularly  the root, and she wrote about how at first the plants looked like wild carrots, and they picked the baby plants and ate them, and that’s when people started dying. The biochemistry of the plant is too strange to mention. The notes are very good. It says that the plants can get up to ten feet tall, and the stems are completely hairless. This is very confusing. We’ve been traveling  for three days, avoiding getting eaten by the poison hemlock(the plant mutated and will eat people, that’s what you get for living in an enchanted pixie world), and finally making it to the original poison hemlock plant. It’s HUGE I mean GIGANTIC. 
It’s just insanely big. It looks like it’s sleeping, until we approach it, and in a very deep, grumbling voice it says, 
“Let the human step forward first. She knows what we really are, she knows more than the botanist. Don’t worry child, I will not harm you, unlike my children I do not hunger for flesh, I am content with the sun, the air and the water, my children are unlike me. You wish to know how to get rid of us, it is a very long, harsh path. It takes years, and much dedication, as the clock continues clicking the botanist will find a way. But, for now, you are going home, with the Prince of the pixies. Botanist come here. . . I will show you how to get rid of us, so no more harm can be done to your people.” And, there’s another hole we fall into, the forest swirls and looks creepy, then James and I crash land into the couch. 
“That was one crazy adventure.” 
“But, for once, it wasn’t actually an Adventure on LSD was it? I don’t know. I just don’t know.” 

That was our crazy adventure into the past. And, we have no idea why it happened. We’ve all changed, well, James and I have, he and I are closer after that REALLY LONG ASS WALK through the forest. Fun right? No. Not at all. 






I think it's okay, it could use some more character development but, whatever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Return of the Adventures on LSD Cast!

WELL Adventures on LSD is back! OKAY OKAY maybe not today, but soon. 
Let me explain.


In science, we are studying weeds. And, we had to choose a weed, and then research it, then write a story, create pictures, and then put it all into a powerpoint. I chose poison hemlock. And, naturally, I had to create an LSD adventure for you guys. James the Fucking Pixie, Harry the Unicorn, Jesus, Jesus' zombie-ninja-fairies, me, and Maurise the Narwahl are back! With some  new friends, James' family, The Fucking Pixie clan, his cousin, Elena the Fucking Botanist, and a few others you get to meet later. And, OF COURSE naturally it has to be informational. Which sucks. BUT I'm definitely going to have fun with this. Today, in photojournalism. Because I'm badass like that.

Hmmm. I haven't posted in a while, so I figure I'll let Josh know what's up.

SO I don't exactly really want to go to the engagement party. I just don't. I have a final to work on and I won't know many of the people there. Maddi, Aimee and I constructed a plan. I will go, BUT I will have headphones and music on me to ignore them all if I get stuck in a corner by myself. In a sorta fuck-you-all-you're-lame thing. Because, I'd rather rock out to music than pretend to not care about standing around in a group of people at the zoo by myself. Just figured I'd let you know what's up Josh. If you have any advice on this email me!!!! 

Oh yeah, it's on saturday, and I haven't asked my mom yet.

I Hate Cyclists!

Well, I don't like exactly hate them, I just kinda, yknow, get annoyed with them.

Anyway, I Hate Cyclists is actually a song, made in six minutes by my friend Stephen Pillola. And every sound you hear in the song, is from the sound his voice makes through a box fan. Yeah. It's that intense.

I never want to sleep ever again.

Have you ever had a dream so scary that you never wanted to sleep ever again?

I have. Just last night. And a few times before.

I'll start with the dream I had before last night's dream. So, in my dream, I was a paranormal investigator. Along with an older librarian, and some Brit guy. And, we were looking for ghosts in some really reaaaaalllly really old house. Now, I was on some stairs, and then, the Brit guy got possessed and was beating the living unicycles out of the librarian. And then me. I woke up, and hid under my blankets. And refused to even look at the clock. Or have my feet hanging out from my bed.  I was terrified. 


So... This next one... From last night... I actually kind of don't want to talk about it. 

Relaxation time.

I'm not entirely too sure what to write today, so I just decided about two seconds ago to compile a list of lists. Here goes! 

THINGS I TOTALLY DIG

1.) Tall guys.

2.) Friends who I can talk to about private type stuff (sex, etc.) and who won't get weirded out and go "Enough now." When I'm all like, dude, I want to talk about this to you 'cause I trust you. 

3.) Guys who have dark brown hair, that's medium long, wavy-ish at the top, a cow-lick bit at the back, and copper highlights (okay so what I'm being picky but I rate guys from 1 to Spencer okay? Nuff said.)

4.) Homemade apple sauce, that's fresh and warm and totally awesome because it was made from real apples about ten minutes ago.

5.) Cheesecake. With cherries drizzled over it. 

6.) Books, good books. 

7.) Laying around in the sun in shorts and a tank top, reading and being totally chill and peaceful.

8.) Anything I consider to be legit. Such as: cake mix cookies, good friends, chocolate chips cookies, going to the library and enjoying the peace and quiet, etc etc.

9.) Getting nice compliments, not the general "you're sexy" from random guys but ones like what Mom said yesterday, "Thanks for helping out today, it was nice working in the kitchen with you." 

A TOTALLY LEGIT IN-DEPTH GUY RATING         SCALE.

Smile:

Personality:

Figure:

Hair:

Trustworthiness:

Body Comfortability*:

*I.E. would you feel totally comfortable in a bikini when he's around?

Secrets (as in, can you  tell him absolutely anything and everything?): 

Uhm.... I forgot the rest, Aimee and I made it up a while back, and it's in my last diary somewhere. 

CHUMS AND CHUMMETTES

   In order of closeness

GIRLS:                                                       GUYS:

1.) Paige                                                                                         1.) Spencer

2.) Aimee                                                                                         2.) James? Ish.

3.) Maddi & Mariah                                                                  3.) Mike. Well, not really he gets 

4.)Alisa, my sis                                                                                  the whole epilepsy thing.

5.) Hmm... That's it.                                             

WELL, I'm kind of bored of lists and want to make a collection of trolls on photoshop and download stuff from youtube. So, 

s'laters!

Doing junk.... Hahaha not.

So, I started this, about thirty minutes ago. And, it's been open for thirty minutes just blank. No writing so, now there's writing. Because, there's that little to do. 

And The Spoon Jumped Over The Moon

Today has a weird title, because I'm feeling weird. I don't know why I'm feeling weird. I just.... Am. I have recently gotten waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayinto the old cartoon Animaniacs. And, I love to quote it and be funny and go hahahaha look at my funniness.

Animaniacs has the perfect balance of violence, educational quality, and really subtle dirty jokes. It's fucking awesome. See? I even swore online on my little blog because it's so awesome. And, I don't necessarily need to swear, but the word seemed to fit at the time. SO LOOK IT UP PEOPLE. IT'S GOOD! YEAH!

"Good night everybody!"